How to Find Comfortable Fullness
Finding comfortable fullness was something I really struggled with after my eating disorder. I kinda went from one extreme to the other during my recovery. And I thought that I was bad for that. I thought that I would never be able to control myself around food now that I vowed to not restrict myself from any one food. But what I realized with how I was experiencing this transition is so normal and part of the natural healing that should take place for each of you dealing with making peace with food. I can say that I went from restricting foods, to over-doing it on some foods, to now feeling happy and balanced with eating and with where I choose to stop eating. I know this is something a lot of you deal with, so I'm writing this today to help you realize that what you're feeling right now is totally NORMAL! Let's talk about how to find comfortable fullness!
Precursor to this post...this is not a 1, 2, 3 step by step instruction kinda post. I'm not going to give you 5 steps to finding comfortable fullness because this looks different for everyone and takes a different amount of time for everyone. I will definitely share with you my personal experience because I know that mine is very similar to other people's from what I've heard. But also, this process is very individualized. So, as I always say, give yourself a whole lotta ton of grace! (yes, whole lotta ton!)
I shared briefly when I wrote my post with the recipe for Cast Iron Skillet Pizza the other day that pizza was one of my restricted foods and that I had a hard time at first when I finally did allow myself full freedom with pizza knowing how to stop when I was full. I would always seem to finish eating my 4th slice of pizza and feel super gross and uncomfortable. When you get to this state, it's super easy to let the guilt creep in. Don't let it! Your experience with getting uncomfortably full is all part of the process. The absolute worst thing to do in this situation would be to judge yourself and condemn yourself for eating that much. This process of judgement leads you back to restriction, the very place you were trying to get out of.
Know the foods that trigger you to overeat.
Sometimes we have certain foods that we always seem to overeat. There can be a number of reasons why. Maybe you had restricted that food so much in the past that over-eating is your body's way of making sure that it won't be restricted again. Maybe your tendency is a little OCD and the tendency with a pan of brownies is to finish a row even after you've already gotten to hunger, causing you to eat more and become overly full just to make an even row to save (been there!). Whatever your situation is, some foods are more triggering for certain people. The key is recognizing your triggers for overeating, figuring out why it's your trigger, and then moving forward.
If you're still thinking about food, you're probably not at comfortable fullness yet.
Some people have a hard time reaching comfortable fullness at all because they're scared to feel full, thinking that fullness is a bad thing. But hear me out. Being full is good and normal. One way to know if you're not quite at a comfortable fullness is that you find yourself still thinking about food. That comfortable and satisfied place is oftentimes found when you no longer think so much about food. You don't need to, because you're satisfied and full! But when we don't eat enough, you'll oftentimes find yourself still thinking about food, still feeling like something's lacking. This is such a great sign you can use to see if you're at a comfortable fullness yet. After eating, get back to what you're doing and if you're still feeling a little emptiness and still thinking about eating, you should probably reach for a snack or a second helping.
Be an observer and nurturer.
Instead of passing judgement on yourself for getting over-full or eating too much, let me suggest you be simply an observer as well as a gentle nurturer. You can observe, "I ate too much pizza. I'm now uncomfortable." These are simple facts. No judgement or condemnation. You can also be a gentle nurturer to yourself and ask yourself, "why did I eat that much?" Maybe you were stressed out and seeking food for comfort. Maybe you were tired and subconsciously believed that by eating you would find that energy you need when the reality is you just need a good 10 hrs of sleep. Maybe you didn't eat enough throughout the day and found yourself eating so quickly that you had no chance to be mindful with your eating because you were starving! These are all situations to learn from, to grow from, and to try and be more intuitive with the next time you eat.
I had to do this with a number of different foods and a number of different meals during my recovery. I say recovery, and it was, but it was also just my time of figuring out how to eat freely again! If you've spent years restricting, don't expect to be able to wake up one morning and be a perfect intuitive eater right away. It takes time to tear down those lies, those false beliefs that you've come to know as truth for so long. It takes time to learn to be an intuitive eater once again. So be patient.
Here's a couple more tips with finding comfortable fullness with foods you once restricted:
If you know that you often over-eat on a certain food, add something nutritious to your plate. For me in this pizza scenario, I like to prepare a salad to go along with it. I'll eat the salad and two slices of pizza, and then ask myself if I want anything more. Most often I'm satisfied after that. But yes, still sometimes there are times I want another slice or two. The key is to balance your plate to start, trying to make half your plate veggies and the other half consisting of some form of carbohydrate, protein, and fat. After that, decide what you want more of, being sure to give yourself permission to eat whatever that is.
Eat the food often. Whether that's every day for some foods or every week, continual exposure is going to help you with realizing that the food you'd restricted for so long isn't as scary as you though as well as help you with practicing eating it to a healthy fullness. I will recommend clients buy that food, keep it in their house, and eat it daily until they feel comfortable with it. Exposure is key! Your body is smart and doesn't like to be told it can't have something :)
Eat slowly, savor your food. I'm super guilty of not doing this, but I definitely notice a difference when I'm paying attention to the food I'm eating. It should be simple, but I know this is a tricky thing for all of us busy people to get down. But it's oh so important!
Those are the big pointers I have for you. If you're struggling with finding comfortable fullness, know that I feel ya! I struggled with it myself for a while, but with some practice and with following some of these tips I've laid out for you here, I now feel so much more balanced with how I eat and less often find myself eating to an uncomfortable state. Not gonna say I'm perfect at it...no one is, believe it or not...and there's definitely days that I eat and feel too full. But that's, again, all normal and all part of being human. What my goal for you is to help you feel less guilt with being too full and feel more balanced and get to uncomfortable fullness less often.
If you struggle with eating to an uncomfortable fullness often and want help with feeling more balanced, I'd love to help you with that! Schedule a discovery call to get started!